The Fool
This blog was modified from an email I wrote this past summer. The story of the classic tarot begins with one card- the fool. A symbol for beginning a new journey, he leads the major deck without much of a clue of what he's doing. The major suit continues through power, intuition, emotions, domination, restriction, love, victory, introspection, karma, justice, suspension, endings (and subsequent new beginnings), addiction, disaster, hope, anxiety, positivity, absolution, and ends with the card "The World." The World stands for completion, integration, and accomplishment.
Over the past decade, I've been a traveling spiritual fool. One thinks of the classic Eastern student, traveling from guru to guru, ashram to ashram. I've been given lectures, lessons, learning material, and hope from each of my teachers. Some have been very literally my spiritual gurus, like John in Texas. Some have been whisper-quiet and unassuming (possibly even unaware) of their spiritual lessons. My ashrams have been my mentor's aged wooden house in the middle of nowhere, my grandfather's house in New Orleans, the Atlantic coast, the ruins of a prison cemetery in Edinburgh, Scotland, my car on long road trips, a camp high in the Rockies, surprisingly enough the Catholic Church, and everywhere in between.
My trip home, especially my trip to Texas last summer, prepared me for the release of my spiritual student status (and release of the current meaning of the word "home"). What does that mean? Of course I'm still an academic student and always will be. It just means that I'm soon turning my listening into speaking for others to hear. My spiritual students and family will find their way to me in Edmonton and I will be serving my purpose of bringing others out of the darkness and hatred that I plagued myself with for so long. THAT is my purpose and it's not out of reach. There is nothing out of our extraordinary reaches. We can have everything you want, and we will be surprised how what you want ends up helping so many more than yourself. I will be proof of that. Don't let go of the life you see. With 30 years of preparation, the most amazing things can be experienced and achieved.
A psychic message I got from a friend at my church in Houston told me that I can have a life "here" (she gestured low) or "here" (she gestured high above her head). I'm choosing high, I'm choosing big. Fear of rejection has been an underlying theme of my life (related to fear of abandonment/adopted child syndrome). I'm walking away from fear in all forms. It has done nothing but hold me back.
Out of everything my journeys have taught me, the most important is to sit with the quiet and listen. Sometimes feel. Mostly listen. And that dreams sometimes have major significance. Action necessarily comes after realization, or dreams remain only dreams.
And how far I've come since I originally wrote this. I thought I would share it with you guys. Thank you for being a part of my dreams.
Love and Light,
Margie